Mom Vs Mom

Last night umi managed to get in touch ( by accident) with a teacher friend who used to teach music at SMK Tunku Sofiah  back in 1998.  Last time,we  teachers had to share tables with other teachers who taught in the afternoon. so this man teacher would come in the afternoon and we used to talk before i left the school. Then, he did his masters and he got a place in maktab perguruan Arau, the same time i got the transfer to matriculation college. so we went separate ways.

When we chatted last nite,, he told me that he is taking care of his 84 year old bedridden mother, and being the only child, the whole responsibility is his. He told  me that he does everything: washing the clothes, cleaning his mom, changing diapers, the chores that i normally think only done by women.  He hires Indon maid who looks after his mom from 8.00 - 1.00 and after that he is in charge. Well, maybe some think where is his wife. if memory serves me right, i still remember that he also has a disabled child and i am sure his wife has to care for the child too.

Learning about his situation makes me think how lucky i am, as i still have other siblings to help me looking after my mom. To add to that blessing, my mom is still independent even though she cannot  move much. i only help with the washing and cleaning. Cooking is mostly done by my sister in law and my brother sends food everyday. Thus, i am not alone. But thinking about my friend, my heart really goes for him as he is alone and he said sometimes his frustration gets the better of him. i can definitely understand that...because one must be very patient when dealing with the elders, as sometimes, they just focus on their problem, and we as children must control our emotion, really really compose ourselves, if not we will face a very frustrating time, not because of the burden but more because our failure to understand what actually the elders want. So that is the main challenge.

To add to that, i also read the post by Diari Hatiku ,highlighting the everlasting love of a mother even though the children neglect her till her death. the only one who loves and remembers her is her own husband...so touching.... I feel so sad thinking about children who somehow forget to spend their precious time with their parents....so to those who still  have parents, pick up a phone and make that valuable call, or even better, take a day or two off and return to where you actually belong - your parents' house.